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Kareen's yoga by Kareen
Zebroff
Reflection seems to be a national pastime at this time
of year. My husband and I once spent the season trying
to define "intelligence." It afforded us a great
deal of pleasure to exercise our minds in that way, since
we had already been practising yoga asanas for our body,
and meditative techniques for our spirit.
An intense meditation under the supervision of a swami
hopefully leading to samadhi did, just once, bring me to
the devoutly-to-be-pursued but highly elusive state of
bliss-consciousness. That incredible experience was, for
lack of a comparable word, hugely "orgastic"
- the closest mankind can come, my swami said laughingly,
to explaining such an indescribable feeling of joy.
By the end of that year, Peter and I came to the conclusion
that although there are many different kinds of intelligence,
the best kind is based on past experience, or what Freud
called "common-sense bordering on genius."
True intelligence, we felt strongly, is neither snobbish,
pejorative, nor even 'guruish', but practical, real,
and compassionate. However, given our human imperfections,
it seemed difficult to implement in a practical way.
That is where the modern equivalent of the yoga yamas
and niyamas came in. The first two stages of Patanjali's
"Eight Limbs of Yoga," yamas are universal
commandments or ethical disciplines, and niyamas are
rules of conduct involving individual discipline. Both
are designed to control humanity's animal passions, compulsions
and emotions, the better to keep harmony between its
fellow beings.
In modern terms, the universal yamas require one to strive
for the five ideals of: non-violence - in speech, deed,
and thought; truth - integrity in both word and thought;
non-stealing - or non-cheating; continence - involving
self-restraint and moderation in all you do; and, non-coveting
- no envy, jealousy or unhealthy competitiveness.
The individual disciplines of niyamas ask us to aim for:
purity - inside and out; contentment - including optimism,
a living in the moment, and thankfulness in prayer; ardour
or austerity - warmth, devotion, eagerness (to follow
your bliss), or discipline and lack of excess; and, study
of the self - not being in denial, having accountability
for one's actions, and loving even one's imperfections,
for what they can teach.
Reflecting on all that we had thus far learned from life
in general, and yoga in particular, Peter and I resolved
to make a list of New Year's resolutions that I could
pass on to my viewing audience of 1972. Thirty years
of good and yet challenging experience later, I have
updated these resolutions for whatever worth they may
have for my reading audience of 2003.
1. Observe and practice the yoga yamas and niyamas.
2. Make a yoga sanctuary with candles, pictures, flowers,
and meaningful personal mementos -- so that you might
be able to withdraw into your quiet inner space "where
God resides."
3. Make yoga your own. Practice the type of yoga that
suits your particular personality best, and which you
are most likely to do regularly -- as long as it is based
on the classical model and adheres to its gentle principles
of going only as far as you can and holding there.
4. Resolve to practice yoga all day long. If you are
too busy or stressed-out to find yoga time: a forward
leg stretch against the bathroom counter, a forward bend
while brushing your hair, “the lion” while
gripping the steering wheel at a stop-light, balancing
while on the phone, squatting while peeling vegetables,
twisting when getting something out of a cupboard, the
abdominal lift to pick up things, the sitting chest expander
in a chair at work or at home, Aswini Mudra (Kegel’s
exercises) while at a dinner party, and all sorts of
yoga asanas in front of the TV.
5. Follow Don Miguel Ruiz' philosophical Toltec Agreements
of: a) integrity with your word, b) never taking things
personally, c) never making assumptions (i.e. about the
intent of others), and d) always doing your best, but
accepting that your best can have its peaks and valleys.
6. Consider our (hopefully intelligent) resolutions based
on 41+ years of marriage:
- Say "poor baby," and mean it, when the
other vents an upset or hurt, but please don't offer
solutions.
- Calmly state, when the other just doesn't seem to
"get" your point of view, "Please respect
that this is important to me!"
- Know that anger almost always disguises your own
feelings of fear, sadness or hurt; when you are upset
it is not so much about others, but about your own
"stuff."
- Get help from mentors, pastors, priests, rabbis,
mullahs, psychologists, friends, or doctors if you
are unusually depressed, exhausted, or feel mentally
over-extended.
- Praise and smile often, saying "I love you"
daily.
Have a most rewarding new year - in every aspect of
your life.
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